One of the worst possible things to make suffer through is having to work with other people.
I don’t know if it’s that I just like less people than I did before, or I stopped pretending to enjoy working with others, or other people are just really that annoying, but I get so flustered having to rely on other people to do things.
It is the bain of my existence to not be able to move forward with my own plans because of other people.
I am always planning something for someone. I’m busy 95% of the time. This is true.
The suckiest part about these facts is that I’m always expected to have it all figured and planned out.
On 2 separate occasions this past week, I was told “What are you doing for your birthday? I was gonna plan a surprise for you and work it out with your bf but you’re always so busy and I figured you’d already planned it out.”
The fudge?!? Then why even mention it to me if you decided against it. Either try to surprise me or don’t but don’t tell me you planned it and decided against it. That’s just lazy.
I don’t usually care for surprises but it would be nice to have a break from planning everything all the time.
“This is how you lose her.
You lose her when you forget to remember the little things that mean the world to her: the sincerity in a stranger’s voice during a trip to the grocery store, the delight of finding something lost or forgotten like a sticker from when she was five, the selflessness of a child giving a part of his meal to another, the scent of new books in the store, the surprise short but honest notes she tucks in her journal and others you could only see if you look closely.
You must remember when she forgets.
You lose her when you don’t notice that she notices everything about you: your use of the proper punctuation that tells her continuation rather than finality, your silence when you’re about to ask a question but you think anything you’re about to say to her would be silly, your mindless humming when it is too quiet, your handwriting when you sign your name in blank sheets of paper, your muted laughter when you are trying to be polite, and more and more of what you are, which you don’t even know about yourself, because she pays attention.
She remembers when you forget.
You lose her for every second you make her feel less and less of the beauty that she is. When you make her feel that she is replaceable. She wants to feel cherished. When you make her feel that you are fleeting. She wants you to stay. When you make her feel inadequate. She wants to know that she is enough and she does not need to change for you, nor for anyone else because she is she and she is beautiful, kind and good.
You must learn her.
You must know the reason why she is silent. You must trace her weakest spots. You must write to her. You must remind her that you are there. You must know how long it takes for her to give up. You must be there to hold her when she is about to.
You must love her because many have tried and failed. And she wants to know that she is worthy to be loved, that she is worthy to be kept.
And, this is how you keep her.Junot Diaz, This is How You Lose Her (via surbeat)
This post is everything.